It is so amazing how, when you think that you couldn't possibly get any more in need of people or reliant upon friends, God shows you another situation. When yo think that you might have a firm grasp on what humility is, think again. God will allow you to learn even more about it.
I have been laid up for a little over a month. I blew my back out the week of Easter. ( It is quite ironic that on the week of easter, I find out the true weight of the cross, or at least enough to get an understanding if only a little bit). I can't carry a five pound bag of potatoes, and yet I need to move in the next few days or so.
Having to rely completely on others for everything is so very humbling. I am moving and for the first time in my life my body is incapable doing any of it or of working as a carpenter. It is time to put my words from the pulpit in to action in my life. When the bible says to rely fully on God and not worry about tomorrow for tomorrow has enough to worry about on it's own. I need to believe that God will in fact provide for me and the journey that He has for me. Seminary is tough enough without all the worries of my inability to provide for myself, not being able to focus and concentrate for any amount of time.
The Proverbs speak of our trust in God: Proverbs 3: 21-26 "My child, do not let these escape from your sight: Keep sound wisdom and prudence, and they will be life for your soul and adornment for your neck. then you will walk on your way securely and your foot will not stumble. If you sit down," your ill not be afraid; when you lie down your sleep will be sweet. Do not be afraid of sudden panic, or of the storm that strikes the wicked: for the Lord will be your confidence and will keep your foot from being caught.
God I love you and I have to admit, I don't doubt you, it is me. Sometimes I doubt my ability to listen and follow through with what it is that you will do for me. I need You Lord!
I have to say thanks to God for getting me through the sermon on Sunday. Lord you showed up in the writing and the delivery of the message. You gave me the courage to share my life with the congregation. You gave excellent scripture verses that tied with my life so well. You gave me strength to stand for 30 minutes. Lord you have provided everything that I need, now please let forth the victory chant that tells me we are going to make it. Lord show me how to fight from the victory of the cross. How do I not let the enemy into my life at this stage. God you name dreams of victory - You are Glory! You are Victory! Jesus, the price you paid on the cross is more the enough! Help me walk that in all that I do, help me get rid of doubt.
Dear Lord, help me get out of this thing alive!
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